What’s in My Bag: Secret Spy Edition

If you watch a lot of spy shows, you know that a good spy is always prepared for anything. At a moment’s notice, you can build a bomb, hack a super-computer, or break into Fort Knox using only a hairbrush & some dental floss. Make sure you have what you might need, and then some. This little bag rides around in my purse, just in case James Bond comes along.

  1. Alcohol Swabs: life is dirty. Your wounds shouldn’t be. There’s nothing like gangrene to put a damper on your activities, so make sure you clean up.
  2. Mini Sewing Kit: sew up anything from your favorite tuxedo to a head wound.
  3. Band-aids: if you’re hurrying away from a crime scene, blood dripping everywhere might blow your cover. Pop a band-aid over it and you’re good to go.
  4. Dental Pick: easier to carry than floss, and a great way to collect someone’s DNA if necessary.
  5. Lighter: nothing says “I’m one of the guys” like sharing your lighter. Or, if they’re not falling for it, you can always light a fuse. Also handy if you have to hide out in the woods for a while.
  6. Disposable Nail Files: when you’re a spy, every detail counts. This is especially true when going undercover as someone high-class, when your nails say something more like “street urchin.”
  7. Hair Ties & Pins: hair pins have a million uses. Pick a lock, recreate the trigger assembly in your gun (ala Michael Weston), or keep your bangs out of your face while defusing something.
  8. Pills: all that negotiating and sneaking around would give anyone a headache. Make sure you have some Ibuprofen on hand.
  9. Motion Sickness Pills: handy for those times when you suddenly need to turn your car into a submarine, airplane, or hang-glider.
  10. Imodium: spies travel- a lot. Unfortunately, with all that travel, comes tons of questionable food. And with all that questionable food, well… Things happen.
  11. Oil-absorbing Face Sheets: useful for soaking up oil in all kinds of places. Get the shine off your nose and fingerprints off of a crime scene.
  12. Tokens: even a spy needs a memento of home that still manages not to give away their identity.
  13. Cotton Balls: great as emergency earplugs when something’s about to go boom, or when you need to conceal something small & delicate, like a bug.
  14. Lotion: spy work is hard on the skin. Whether you’re operating in the desert or the jungle, proper moisturizing is key. It’s hard to blend in with the general populace if your skin looks like a mummy’s.
  15. Mirror: need to send a signal, distract, or blind someone? Want to check out your disguise? A mirror is a sure-fire, easy, pocket-sized way to go.
  16. Hand Sanitizer: as a spy, you’re bound to come into contact with something unsavory, and you may not be able to wash your hands right away.
  17. Microfiber cloth: nothing says “I just went through your cell phone” like a big fat thumbprint on the screen. Make sure you clean up after your self.
  18. Perfume: distract your target with how delicious you smell, or combine with your lighter for some instant flammability.
  19. Lipstick, lip gloss, & lip balm: you may think these are only for the lady-spies, but you’d be wrong. With a good lipstick, you can leave someone a message. A tube of lip gloss can conceal a bug, among any number of other things. And not even a spy trained to withstand torture enjoys the feel of chapped lips.
  20. Lint sheets: the perfect way to remove incriminating fibers from your clothing. A quick application of #5 (see how useful the lighter can be?) and any evidence is up in smoke.
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